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Monday, May 25, 2009

Why The Grass Is Always Greener On The Other Side


Guys....have you ever met the situation where you kept thinking that there are better opportunities out there compared to your current one you are having? Take an example, you have a girlfriend/boyfriend and the thought of settling down always make you feel uneasy because you think that there are better girls/guys out there. This is the syndrome when one is always looking at the other side of the grass and think that the grass is greener on the other side and is also what I call the “greener grass” syndrome.

Why are we like this?

Uncertainty and curiosity plays a big part in creating the “greener grass” syndrome. It is because we are uncertain of whether what we are holding onto now is the best for us and whether are there any better alternatives out there. This uncertainty cause us to keep looking into alternatives and sometime it is doing us more harm than good because consistently looking out for the “greener grass” will sap us of our energy and attention and ultimately what we get will be an angry partner.

Human are also curious by nature and we love new things. We mostly prefer new over old because new things intrigue us and our curiosity will keep prompting us to explore the other side of the grass. These are the 2 factors that cause us to feel unsatisfied with what we have and always harboring the thought of finding the greener grass at the opposite side.

The Bad

So what is so bad about having the “greener grass” syndrome? If you have this syndrome, chances are you are missing out lots of things you currently have now. When we are always focusing on other opportunities, sometime we tend to squander the opportunity right in front of us.

There are lots of great people out there in world who can be your potential partner and sometime the best partner for you is just right in front of you but you did not put in enough effort in developing the relationship because you are spending your energy on searching for other people who seems to be better than the relationship you are having currently.

The Truth

The grass is always greener on the other side, AND the other side is always greener no matter which side you are. Have you seen some of your friends changing their girlfriend or boyfriend frequently because they say that their current boyfriend/girlfriend is just not good enough and there are better options out there. No matter how many times they change their partner, they are still not be satisfied and they will go off again searching for their “greener grass”.

Even when they have a 100% nice guy/girl as their partner, they will forsake the 100% nice guy/girl and search for someone who is 101% nice. Their life will be just running around in circles because once they found the 101%, they will want a 102% and so on and on.

How To Cure The “Greener Grass” Syndrome

The first thing to do is to acknowledge that your current partner is your best partner for you right now. Stay in the present and do not think about the hunks/babes out there who may be better than your current partner. By choosing to stay in the present, we can help to bring ourselves back from the future and preventing to have the thoughts of “what if there are better people out there” or “what if he/she is not for me” and etc.

Always apply your best effort in your current relationship. I had saw friends saying that their relationship can’t work out but from a third party point of view, what I am seeing is actually they are not putting enough effort into the relationship. So what make them think that the relationship is going to work when the effort on his part is negligible.

Last but not least, always remember that the grass is always greener on the other side, no matter which side you are at. Choose a side, stick to it and make the best out of it.

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